Archive | January, 2012

Princess Sequoia laments the ‘Unworthy Girlfriend’ Phenomenon

29 Jan

I think I speak for quite a few of us gals when I say that it’s hard enough to get a boyfriend as it is. There are all sorts of obstacles in our way… the man we like is not interested, or he’s got a girlfriend. Or his type is impossibly perfect in some way, or he’s gay. All these things can be overcome (apart from the last one obviously). But there is another, very unpleasant phenomenon that is becoming more and more common…I speak of the strange anomaly that is…….THE UNGRATEFUL, SLIGHTLY UNHINGED GIRLFRIEND!!!

Moaning Minnies

I thought these were an urban myth,  but I have anecdotal evidence from a couple of friends of mine, and ladies, we don’t want to be coming up against this type of loon…any man prepared to put up with the sort of shit that these unhinged females dish out are certainly not worthy of our attention. One male friend of mine had an incomprehensible sense of loyalty to his girlfriend of seven years even though she constantly put him down and wouldn’t sleep with him.

No treats for the Little General

According to him, the fizz had gone out of the relationship many years before, and yet he was still with her. Why?? I asked, flummoxed. Because if I wasn’t around, he answered, I feel like she couldn’t cope. With what? Paying bills, DIY stuff around the house, things like that…I mean REALLY?? Do guys really want to be with someone like that?? He did everything for her,  he tried to keep her happy, bought her whatever she wanted, but all she did was moan at him…

It was then that I looked at him in a different light – we’d been quite close and there was a mutual attraction between us, but because of his girlfriend it was a no go situation. I’d thought he was just a really nice, thoughtful guy – which he was, but I realised that he was also weak – ‘stay unhappy in a situation to avoid a messy confrontation’. To me, that’s a complete turn-off.

Wet and weak = not attractive

When he said that he thought the only way out of the relationship was for him to leave the country, but even then he thought she would harass him, I realised that he was being 1) ridiculous 2) horribly weak and 3) there was probably more to the whole situation that met the eye, so I let it go.

It’s really most unfair on those of us who would make the most wonderful, undemanding, uncomplicated girlfriends……….well, perhaps just wonderful 🙂

<p><a href=”http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2125″>Image: photostock / FreeDigitalPhotos.net</a></p>

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Princess Ruby on counting calories – sex vs dance

15 Jan

I have welcomed the New Year with a rather monumental list of resolutions. I’m certainly a woman, or Princess as it may be, on a mission for bigger and better things. Gone are the days sitting around in a castle waiting for your fairytale to happen will do. You have to get out there…. glass slippers blazing and make it happen!

With an ambitious year ahead of me… I started out with one of the least extreme items on my ‘to-do’ list; learn to dance.  In hindsight, opting for a fast-paced street dance class may not have been the best place to make my debut – with the class resembling something out of Flash Dance; my two left feet began to sweat before we even started the warm up.

Trying to keep up with the class as they gyrated, jumped and spun was much more of a sweaty challenge than Beyonce makes it out to be. However two classes down…and I’m hooked! It also turns out to be a great way to release some semi-sexual energy, albeit in a slightly clumsy manner. And with little happening on the Prince Charming front, it got me thinking… which is a better workout? Dancing or sex?

Princess Ruby on sex vs dance

My research produced interesting results. According to one website (one which I suspect is yet to yield a scientific stamp of approval) you only burn 25 calories during the act if the woman is on top, add an extra 7 calories for bouncing, 22 for urgent begging, 33 calories for trying to keep your eyes open, and 27 for orgasm! Giving you a grand total of 114. However for someone my weight, an hour of fast dancing would have burnt 272 calories. Dancing wins!

Although according to the same questionable website, I could have upped the ante and produced better results if I were caught misbehaving with someone other than my partner – apparently trying to explain would have given me 165 calories, getting dressed in one large motion 300, jumping out of the window 15 (add an extra 5 if the window wasn’t open).

So if I were prepared to get myself in this messy situation, jump out of bed and into a closed window, sex would win hands down.

Therefore the results are open to debate, and of course a combination of both activities, with the dancing being the back-up, would be ideal. However in the meantime, I shall continue with my resolutions, which now may include testing out some of the above….perhaps minus the cheating.

Princess Sequoia’s New Year’s Resolutions

8 Jan

New Year = new ideas, fresh start, different perspective blah blah blah.. Yes, unbelievably, January is here AGAIN and here I am blathering on AGAIN about focusing on my career or the lack thereof and how I’m going to forget about relationships and the lack thereof. I was talking to a friend and I reckon she’s got the right idea; her current approach to men is to have a few on the go, like a variety pack – what they’ve got in common is that they’re all young, fit and different types.

Life is like a box of chocolates

So she’s got her accountant, her footballer, her personal trainer, her entrepreneur, her construction worker. Like a box of chocolates, she chooses which flavour she prefers on the day… If one guy lets you down, at least you’ve got another four to choose from. Besides, she told me, right at this moment she wants a lot of fun but no commitment – it means she doesn’t get distracted by emotional minefields like being in love or not being loved enough.

Don’t underestimate fun!

Isn’t it a bit soulless? I asked her, no real security, not having one person really care about you and you both know it’s just in the moment..? Her answer – of course it would be lovely to have all those commitment things…but in reality it doesn’t often work out that way, at least not for her. So why not have a good time with an array of gorgeous, hand picked guys who find her irresistible – it’s a huge ego boost and she can always get good er…sound financial advice for free…