Princess Sequoia and Internet Dating – Part 1

10 Jun

Dates 1 – 6
I have been reflecting on my internet dating adventures…When I first looked into virtual romance I signed up with three different sites…that’s when money wasn’t a problem and I thought it could be a real option. …I saw sense eventually and picked one site which seemed to offer good value and normal looking men.

I thought that I went in with my eyes wide open, but looking back, I admit I was somewhat gullible and, 2 years on, I look back on my internet experience fondly, but with no real wish to revisit it again.

For those of you who are considering this course of action in order to secure True Love, I’ve compiled a summary of my dating experiences, starting with the first six. These will either spur you on or put you off..either way, it’s been an eye-opener…

Date 1 – Riad.. I was seriously deceived by the one picture I had of him, and gave it the benefit of the doubt, being caught up as I was  in the excitement of Date One. He was NOT as he appeared, and spent most of our date trying to convert me to Islam apart from when he was telling me what a great boss (he was a chef) he was to his staff. He was disappointed that he didn’t get a kiss at the tube station, but considering I almost walked away when I first saw him, he was lucky he got any of my time at all!!

Date 2 – Larry…ah Larry. A gorgeous, hilarious, charming fellow – I was dazzled by his good looks and charisma and thought we were a goer. Unfortunately, he had just come out of a ten year marriage and was playing the field which I only found out later. We had lots of dates but they were few and far between..I hung on in for about a year before it got really boring.

Date 3 – Shean was a lovely boy who was very attractive and polite but who, because of a bad experience with a Russian girl he’d fallen in love with and who was only after a visa, was incredibly needy and insecure – and that was only on the first date – so he was a no-no.

Date 4 – Jan. Another nice guy, but his idea of a date was walking up Oxford Street, Cambridge Circus, Soho, Tottenham Court Road and back down Oxford Street, with one cup of coffee along the way. That’s one long fucking walk. Plus, I’m a Central Londoner and know this area very well, I don’t need to see it again.  AND I was wearing my platform wedges, so was not best pleased.

Date 5 – Raj. A very hot dentist, which is not your usual combination I find. We went for dinner, but he was obviously not interested in me and spent an inordinate amount of time eyeing up the girl sitting next to me. He was also an arrogant little shit – he told me that he ‘only employed really pretty nurses, to keep the day interesting’. Fair enough I suppose, but it did nothing for my self confidence which was already taking a bashing from his eyes constantly wandering to the chick on the next table.

Date 6 – What can I say about Sam? On paper he seemed nice – he had apparently got his sister to write his profile for the site as ‘he couldn’t think of anything to say about himself’..DON’T FALL FOR THIS AS IT’S THE OLDEST TRICK IN THE BOOK. Anyone who says their friend/sister/mother has this to say about them (and it’ll always be something extremely flattering) is lying their head off and relying on the gullibility of the reader to believe it.

Sam turned out to be a rather bizarre character (he looked like some kind of non-specific, small furry animal, maybe a mole) who took me to the  bar of a bland hotel where everyone seemed to be couples who looked like they were having illicit affairs. Sam was keen to expedite our meeting to a bedroom in the hotel – this became clear after he followed me to the Ladies loo and made his intentions crystal. I declined the offer, and we went our separate ways.

There’s more of this to come in Princess Sequoia’s Internet Dating -Part 2. Watch this space!

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